Being that the school year is starting this week, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to discuss the stress that everyone is put under during the school year.
First, let me start by saying that I don’t get angry easily. If there is one thing that I won’t abide however it’s when a family chides their children for not applying themselves in school. I WILL speak up when I see or hear this going on. Coming from that VERY experience I believe gives me a unique perspective. Maybe the children ARE doing the BEST they can. By climbing on your children’s backs and continuing to ride them you MAY wind up alienating them instead of helping. Keep that in mind the next time you think about coming down hard on your children!
I’m NOT saying you don’t have the right to tell your children to do their best, to study and to do all their homework. That goes WITHOUT saying! What I am trying to get across, however is if they stop sharing how they are doing and if they seem to shrink away or are avoiding you at every turn, perhaps it is time to reexamine your OWN attitude.
Reach out to your child if he hasn’t done as well on a test, quiz or homework as he could have. Tell him it is alright. Tell him that everyone has bad days. Better yet, show him. You know what they say:
Show don’t tell.
I’m sure you have experiences during your education where you haven’t done as well as you thought you could have. Don’t reprimand your child for EVERY bad grade or EVERY poor performance they bring. If you consider the child has punished himself enough for the performance they gave and you REACH out instead of LASH out, you JUST may be surprised the next time your child has DONE better. Sometimes you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Take it under advisement and you may see your relationship with your children growing stronger instead of drifting apart.
Remember! Everyone eventually will find their way. It may take some children longer. I find it difficult to understand how high school graduates are supposed to know what they want to do the rest of their lives. I think it is more amazing when someone knows what they want at such an early age and pursues it.
I knew that I wanted to be around books at an early age, whether writing them or working in the book field. I didn’t receive the acknowledgement that I’d be able to make a living doing that. Well, I detoured my choice from writing to being in the book field. And I AM making my living. I found my bliss. Everyone will eventually make their way in this world. Keep that in mind the next time you consider downplaying your child’s dream.
Be Happy! Be Well! Be Positive!