Once more it is proven to me that we get things when we need them.


That God will ALWAYS provide.  It is now Thursday night and I hadn’t written anything for Monday’s column at Wisdom and Life.  Uh oh.  I thought.  It’s coming down to crunch time.  I need enough opportunity to have written a column and edit it so that when it goes live all the imperfections will be eradicated.  At lunch time as I left work, my friend Glenn walked into the library and said he wanted to thank me for my new found detachment.  That’s all I needed. And I had my topic. Since it is now Thursday night, I will have three full days to go through and edit.  


Image from:


Detachment you say?  Yes.  Read on:






Merriam Webster defines detachment as:

: lack of emotion or of personal interest
: the act or process of separating something from a larger thing
: a condition in which something has become separated from something else


When you look at the definition from a spiritual point of view a lack of attachment can aid you in relationships.  A sense of detachment can aid you in everything about your life. When you no longer stress over what MIGHT happen and simply understand that what is supposed to happen will, life will flow so much easier. It’s done so for me:

When you don’t expect anything from someone else and you understand that whatever happens is supposed to happen you can live your life with so much more ease.


The first definition above can seem a bit harsh when discussing a relationship. But

–If you can detach from any expectation
–If you can stop worrying about what someone else thinks or wants
–If you can think about your life and all your relationships as separate from yourself and let go of control, let go of the need to expect anything, you will ultimately find the exact relationship you’ve been looking for.


It’s not an easy concept to embrace or fulfill.  It takes constant vigilance, but once you arrive at that place. You find not only peace but also a sense that you’ve finally found your happy place.  No longer will you stress over:
–Will they call?
–Will they visit?
–Do they really like me or is it all a ploy to get something from me?


No longer will you stress over:
–Is this where I’m supposed to be?


Detachment takes all that away.

Detachment isn’t a bad thing when used in a spiritually motivated way.  It can help us all live a healthier spiritual life.  As I said above:
It’s not an easy undertaking, however. When you consider the alternative:
–Always expecting people to live as we live.
–Always expecting a response and when none is forthcoming getting anxious, dismayed, wondering why.


–Always stressing over life’s curveballs.
–Wondering what happened.
–Why you are in this particular position.


Wouldn’t life be easier, if you let go of all that anxiety?  You can.

Simply detach from any outcome and let whatever happens happen. It took me a long while to get to this point.  Now that I’ve arrived, there ain’t no way I’m going back; which is not to say I don’t still slip. I do. However, as I’m fond of saying at Wisdom and Life, now that I recognize the pattern of slipping it is that much easier to right myself. It DOES take constant vigilance, though.


Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.


Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.


2 thoughts on “Detachment

  1. Martha Orlando

    A work in progress here, Chris, but detachment is a worthy, spiritual goal. We are trusting that God has our back, and in light of that, we are exactly where we need to be.

  2. Jean Wise

    Love that Merton quote. I like to use the phrase – hold things lightly. and be aware of what I cling to – if it draws me closer to God or away from him. That helps me discern how tightly to hold that attachment. Good words and yes amazing how they come along at just the right time.

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