Uh oh.  Today’s column will probably stir up some controversy.  What you decide is ENTIRELY up to you.  I certainly won’t judge anyone by the decisions they make.  And as I wrote here, this is NOT an easy choice to make.  There comes a time when enough IS enough.  It’s up to each of us to make that decision when we’ve reached that point.  The trick is knowing when that point has come.  Too soon and you’ll always be thinking:
What if?


Too late and you’ll be cursing yourself for letting a loved one stay too long.


One of Scranton Memorial Library’s frequent patrons, (let’s call her Rita) came into the library a few weeks ago. I don’t recall how we began this discussion but we started talking about what happens if someone is incapacitated in a nursing home or a hospital and wants to end their lives.


Image from:


You do of course understand that we sign a contract when we incarnate?  Who are we to break a contract? And what happens when we break one?  You know what I THINK happens when we take our own lives even IF we are suffering?  


When someone takes their own life it is a one way ticket back to the physical.  As I’ve written at Wisdom and Life on numerous occasions, when someone dies by their own hand, I believe they don’t see Transition Tunnel, they don’t meet those in their soul group.  This is not a punishment.  Everything that happens in our lives is a tool to teach us.


Life is sacred and we shouldn’t decide when to end it.  Even as I’m writing this, I’m conflicted.  On the one hand, EVERYTHING in my soul says that we can NOT and should NOT do what God has decreed, what we have decreed when we choose our lives.  We choose not only our lives, but the challenges we will face in each incarnation.  When we become physical we forget the time we spent in Transition Hall.  If, as I believe we choose the challenges we will face and the way we will transition out of each life how can we break that contract?


Uh ha!

You may say.  What if we chose taking our life?  I suppose that’s possible, however I would like to think someone with greater power than ourselves would do their best to dissuade us.  We shouldn’t have that power.  Life is a gift and we shouldn’t return it.  I certainly understand the situation one can find themselves in if they are in a place where there seems to be no way out, where there seems to be no way to get better.  In the end the choice is ours.  No one wants to be on life support letting a machine keep us alive.  However, miracles DO happen.


I do believe we shouldn’t mess with our transition date.  I believe that date is carved in stone and to change it arbitrarily, because we are in emotional or physical pain will only cause us to repeat the same pain at exactly the same point in our lives until we learn to move beyond it.  Whether you believe that is entirely up to you. What you choose to believe is entirely up to you.


Everything comes down to a choice and what you decide to do with it.


Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.


Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

4 thoughts on “When is it the End?

  1. Marge Cohen

    Thank you, Chris! I appreciate this. I would never have thought about it, IF I needed to.

  2. Martha Orlando

    While I most definitely am with you here, Chris, I know there are people who are so depressed and/or hurting that this is the only way they see out. So, so sad and tragic! Yes, life is a gift and one to only be returned once God calls us home.

    1. Christopher Jennings Penders

      Thanks, Martha! It’s why I struggled with this column. Had this scheduled for two weeks ago but pulled it at the LAST minute.

  3. Jean Wise

    We recently know of two young men who took their own lives. Besides the loss of their lives the devastation left behind on their family and friend is heart breaking. so sad. so unnecessary. We are all loved and worthy no matter our circumstances. Thanks for tackling a difficult topic, Chris

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