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Are you single?  Do you want to find a long term relationship?  I have one piece of advice:
Stop looking! 


Image from:
What?  You may be asking.  How will I find anyone if I don’t look.  I’m sure you’ve heard it before that it’s only when you stop looking that what you want will appear.  In my previous column:
At First Sight each of the people I wrote about showed up in my life when I wasn’t looking.  I can also affirm that all the times I have actively looked for a relationship, nothing has come of it.  That’s a lesson I continually have to be reminded of. As I’ve written here previously:
–I often wonder if I incarnated during the wrong time period this time.
–I often wonder if the person in my soul group who I’m matched with decided or if I decided in this incarnation to live separately.
–I often wonder if we decided to be friends only during our time in this incarnation


Because you do understand if you adhere to this philosophy that we choose the life we live BEFORE we incarnate.  Everyone in our soul group will always be with us but sometimes we choose not to be romantically linked. I believe those in our group are the only ones we can, would and will be romantically linked with and since souls are light and energy there is no male or female.  We choose that when we incarnate as well. I completely understand that I may lose some of you here with this esoteric worldview and that’s alright.  I certainly don’t expect everyone to accept everything I believe.  These pieces of my worldview have been sewn into my fabric over many years, through various resources.  


Dr Michael Newton’s Journey of Souls has played an instrumental role in developing my concepts of soul groups and choosing our lives.  Those in our soul group show up when we need them and just because you haven’t found your one romantic partner, (in this worldview) doesn’t mean you didn’t.  It could be your best friend of the opposite sex is the partner you’ve always been matched with and as I said earlier in this column, perhaps one or both of you decided to be FRIENDS during this your most recent incarnations.  I believe that COULD be the case for many of us. As I’m writing this, I feel better knowing it could be a valid explanation.  


It’s only when I forget, that I find myself becoming distressed.  However, it makes sense that some of us continue to search for that partner and have been unsuccessful.  Because we already have the person in our lives that we are linked to.


At First Sight should provide evidence enough for those who understand the esoteric philosophy of soul groups and choosing each life we will lead before we incarnate.  We only have to put these words into action and when we find ourselves slipping, circling the emotional drain, pitying ourselves because we haven’t found that ONE person yet.  Remember:
The people in our soul group will show up when we need them and not before.  Perhaps we haven’t found them yet because we don’t truly need them yet or perhaps as in the movie:
Made in Heaven we set a limited amount of time to find them.  Whatever the reason, they are already in our lives and we are only friends during this lifetime, or we haven’t found them yet.  There’s another possibility and one I’ve toyed with myself. I actually included it in my own book:
Taking Off A Coat: Ruminations on the Infinite Soul 

Sometimes I wonder if karma is playing a role in my own circumstances:
Maybe I was a philanderer, and the fact that I have so many women who are my friends is because women see me as a non threat in this lifetime. The karmic aspect being that I can’t find that long term relationship because I’m paying my debt in this lifetime for a previous lifetime’s philandering.


I know.  I know. Sometimes as with my belief in reincarnation and karma many of you may see me going off The Deep End.  But this is who I am now.  This is my worldview. Accept me or not.  We all have beliefs that run counter to others.  It’s what makes us human. I wouldn’t want it any other way.


Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.


Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;
We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

2 thoughts on “Stop Looking

  1. Roy A Ackerman, PhD, EA

    Not sure this works at all, Mr. CJP…

  2. Martha J Orlando

    I do believe we meet people at the right time and at the right place, when they are meant to be a positive source in our lives.
    Blessings, Chris!

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